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Martin Barrett

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A three inch artillery shell dropped onto my right big toe one day and shattered it. I couldn't find a ride and I couldn't take the car, so I rode my bike the 72 miles to Oak Knoll Hospital in Oakland, California. At about 2AM, I got out - but with a cast that ran clear up past my knee. I hobbled out to the parking lot, broke off the top part of the cast above knee and proceeded to ride the bike home with the cast on. Good thing I didn't have crutches, I didn't have anyplace to put them.

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Guest ratchethack
A three inch artillery shell dropped onto my right big toe one day and shattered it. I couldn't find a ride and I couldn't take the car, so I rode my bike the 72 miles to Oak Knoll Hospital in Oakland, California. At about 2AM, I got out - but with a cast that ran clear up past my knee. I hobbled out to the parking lot, broke off the top part of the cast above knee and proceeded to ride the bike home with the cast on. Good thing I didn't have crutches, I didn't have anyplace to put them.

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Great story, Carl. Reminds me of a similarly painful-sounding self-propelled trip to the emergency room I took due to an incident with a table saw (kickback) whereby the bones of 3 fingers were shattered into pieces too small for the ortho surgeon to pin back together ... :o

 

I particularly like the part about breaking off the top of the cast so you could ride back home. ;) It actually sounds a little safer than the way I did it... Thankfully, it was also in the middle of the night, so there wasn't any traffic.

 

But enquiring minds just gotta know:

 

HOLY SCHNIKIES, CARL!

 

How is it that a 3-inch artillery shell landed on your toe within 72 miles of Oakland - at 2 AM? Was there a war that I missed, or is this the kind of ordnance you need in the environs of Oakland these days for routine home defense?! :huh2:

 

No wonder you moved to Chandler, OK!!!

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These are good stories.

 

Reminds me of the time I bounced off a Landrover in the UK with my old Triumph Daytona. Picked the bike up [after a small but significant exchange with the Landrover driver], kicked it straight, rode it home. Next day, went to the hospital for a check and came back covered in plaster.

 

Sorry: whenever I see someone suffering, I have to suffer, too, if only in retrospect!

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How is it that a 3-inch artillery shell landed on your toe within 72 miles of Oakland - at 2 AM?  Was there a war that I missed, or is this the kind of ordnance you need in the environs of Oakland these days for routine home defense?!  :huh2:

 

No wonder you moved to Chandler, OK!!!

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Well, the story is a tad longer than that. I was leaving the Naval Reserve Center in Vallejo and a wire off of the equipment I was carrying snagged on a decorative 3" shell flanking the quarterdeck. It fell straight over and the rather heavy solid metal nosepiece decided to re-arrange the last bone in my right big toe as well as break the toenail in two crosswise. That was at about 4 pm. It was too sore at the time to determine much, but by the time I got home that evening, it was readily apparent that something needed to be done. That's the first part of the story. The last part is even better. <_ at the time my wife and i had a large waterbed in small bedroom. side of bed was perhpas from wall just enough space to slide down get bed. waterbeds though are not flat least ours wasn it curved some sides. middle night cast would drag leg out as slid curve then smack into on their way floor. with big toe end bone broken three pieces impact particularly good wake up after four days removed opted wear steel toed boots until healed. very last part story is worst. remove toenail myself new started growing under old one. that took me about two weeks peeling loose each pain stopped cold. next repeat process. eventually peeled loose. makes you want cringe doesn>

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...Makes you want to cringe doesn't it?

It would, except my cringe threshold was raised considerably in a similar way when I dealt with the healing wreckage of 2 of the aforementioned 3 finger bones, when in the same way, I guess, I pulled out the shattered remnants of the nails with tweezers... Sorta like imagining fingernails scraping across a blackboard, but a whole lot worse, ain't it?.... :whistle:

 

Hey, thanks for completing the story. I'm glad to know things never got THAT bad for you in Oakland. <_<

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About 13 years ago I was running a punch press & punched a 5/16" hole through my middle left finger. Thats slightly larger than a pencil eraser for those who need a reference size. I could look right through the hole.... It was centered right through my fingernail. At the emergency room the doctor pulled what was left of the nail off. I remember telling the doc that the viet cong used a similar method of torture to make our guys talk, I can tell you that even with an anesthetic its the most painful thing ever. Theres my nasty injury tale :doh:

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Since we're in a sharin mood

I ran over MY OWN LEG on a Honda 250 Three wheeler, There's a reason those things aren't made anymore I had rolled twice earlier that day. here it goes Sooo I was out in a field going up hill through some kinda tall grass aprox 5mph then I run over a gopher mound on the back right tire(didn't see it) kicks my left leg back in the process which pushes past the plastic mud guard(I was real off balance) and the wonderful knobs on the tire grabbed onto my shoe like velcro and yanked it under faster than you can say full leg cast. The best part as it pulled me off it was still in first and contiunuied up the hill for just a few second without me....then died...I knew something was broke(in 3 places I found out which they had to rebreak or break more to set it) and I lay there thinking oh shit I'm in the middle of nowhere right now and nobody knows which field I'm in(there was about 1,000 acres for me to roam) Anyway so the honda died then decides to roll BACK down the hill STRAIGHT at my broken leg I'm going oh shit oh shit as I scoot backwards as fast as I can so my leg doesn't get run over AGAIN. Best part of this story as I lay there for about an hour or 2 I see some ppl on the road driving looking for me but the grass is so high and I'm aways back they couldn't see me so I have to crawl back over to the f'n honda climb aboard, start it and drive out about a mile to the closest house I Think that was the most pain I've ever powered through in my life. I shifted with my hand and went slow.

Sidenote I was very affraid of needles (I was about 13) and couldn't swallow pills without choking so they force stuck me with painkillers in my in my bum.... then later they took my nurse buzzer away from the excessive buzzer request for more morphine shots. :huh2:

We should all compete for a prize in this thread

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Mangling of limbs continued:

About 15 years ago my wife and I owned an 1986 Buick Regal. One evening we drove it to dinner. I got out of the car and hit the power locks and swung the big heavy door to close. At the same time I stepped in a hole. Reaching up I accidently grabbed the door to keep from falling backwards. The door closed, flush, with my 3 fingers on my right hand in the door jam. My wife had to run around the car and unlock the door so I could get my hand back out. Off to emergency room. Broke two fingers and destroyed the nail beds on all three fingers. Kinda cool watching the doctor pull little bits of bone and fingernail out while you watch. :2c:

 

That is nowhere as good as a shell landing on your foot, then riding to get it fixed, classic.

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