Jump to content

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 75
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Guest ratchethack

Now don't get me wrong. I favor bocks, heavy lagers, ales and IPA's. All imports, generally, except for micro-brewed US beers. I have no real favorites, after all -- it's all just beer.

 

But one time I came across the following "thumbnail" review of CHEAP BEERS and bought a case just because the review was the best I'd read in a long time. Miller's been my "stand-by" cheapo beer ever since. :bier:

 

CHEAP BEERS

 

Miller High Life

 

Advertised as the "champagne of beers", but that's much too frou-frou. I like "carbonated butter." Miller High Life is big slabs of deer meat on a toasted roll. It's dirty fingernails scooping out pumpkin pie. It makes even the most sterile suburbanite feel like a Teamster. It's outstanding.

 

Rating: Extremely outstanding.

 

__________

 

A few more CHEAP BEER reviews by the same reviewer:

__________

 

Czechvar

 

This is, apparently, a premium Czech lager. And that's probably a telling indicator of what life is like in the Czech Republic. It's watery, stale and tastes like the ass of a drunk sailor. Makes us wonder how long it takes to ship beer from over there.

 

Rating: Gross.

__________

 

St. Ides Malt Liquor

 

This beer gives me the willies. Other beers go down all fizzy, but this goes down in one big glob, like mother's milk. You can really hurt yourself with this crap. The bubbles make it fruity and at 99 cents for a 22-ounce bottle -- poverty makes it attractive.

 

Rating: Cheap.

__________

 

Country Club Malt Liquor

 

This is a Dear John letter from your brain to your liver. It's so smooth and creamy and refreshing I thought the can was made from magic. It packs a hell of a wallop and costs less than a buck a can. Seconds after finishing it, I quit my job and vowed to never wash again.

 

Rating: Niiice.

__________

 

Molson Canadian

 

I once knew this Canadian kid named Paul Gilbert. He had a strange hump on his back, was dumb as a tabletop and sported an enormous penis. This is that kind of beer. What else can you say? It's still cold. This is pretty good.

 

Rating: Pretty good.

__________

 

Hateuy

 

The primative liquids of this pungent beer lead to a nutty aftertaste that is quite unique. The 1950s, hand-brushed injun keeps staring at me, begging me to come to Cuba. Avenge me. There is more of this here for you. Oh, Mi Cooba! But no! Before I go, I feel like scalpin' a few Whiteys!

 

Rating: Inebriating.

__________

 

Steel Reserve 211

 

This was so wonderful, went down smooth as syrup and was really classy, baby. And then I remembered I'm not a Crack Whore! As long as there is any alcoholic alternative, including Prison Wine, this "Steel Reserve" will not pass my lips again.

 

Rating: Sucky.

__________

 

Budweiser Tall Boy

 

I am very drunk. This is the exact kind of thing I want. I just drank it while peeing, thinking to myself that the King of Beers was coming in and the Paupers of Beers were fleeing. That, of course, led to thoughts of why Communism has never taken a hold in the United States and I was just glad I was drinking American.

 

Rating: Freedom.

__________

 

Rolling Rock

 

After a hard day at work and mowing the lawn, I reach for a 16 oz. Rock. It's delicious and bubbly. It makes me want to boff redheads and short blondes. You can tell, from the hops and all that yeast and the amber flaxen how this beer could make you feel golden and moist inside.

 

Rating: Rockin'.

__________

 

Yuengling Traditional Lager

 

Although its brewed in a small Pennsylvania town, Yuengling tastes like it was brewed in a larger, more industrialized town. Perhaps Pittsburgh? Or maybe Allentown? After only two Yuenglings I feel I have the strength to take on a Puerto Rican gang, kill them, and steal *their* hubcaps.

 

Rating: Taut.

Link to comment

I really like shells deer beer, its a local brew but tasty for a beer, they also make 1919 rootbeer, THE best rootbeer ANYwhere I swear to god, it only comes in kegs. SOOOOO good, The only beer they make someone might know is grainbelt premium

grain_Belt1.jpg

Link to comment

Beer is probably the greatest invention known to man. Too little is not enough, and too much is, well . . . too much.

92140[/snapback]

 

Seems like all I can do is contribute non-Guzzi content........... So busy with work right now that there is no time to sort out the problems in the bike.

 

As the former Brewmaster for the (old) Sea Dog Brewing Company here in Maine I can take credit for making a couple hundred thousand gallons while I was there.

We made mostly British style ales but did do some true lagers as well. Sure was a lot of fun.

 

Just wish everyone out there would enjoy beer for all of its qualities and not just drink it to get drunk. Of course, that is about all most american beers are good for. I can't stand the idiot marketing ploys the big breweries use.

 

lately I've been on a Belgium style beer kick. My friend is the New England rep for a brewery in Quebec that makes some good belgium style beers. ALmost as good as the real thing.

 

Check out http://www.unibroue.com/products/maudite.cfm

 

My Avatar "Maudite" is the name of one of their beers.

 

Please, if you are going to drink, just don't ride. I know at least one biker that died after drinking beer I made. Doubt I'll ever get that out of my mind.

Link to comment

I'm not much a beer fan, in fact, I rarely drink the stuff. I'm more of a martini guy. 2 martinis and you're set :sun:

 

However, I did have a beer once while in Freiburg, Germany that was delicious. I think it was Czech beer but I'm not sure. Anyways...it had some yeast in the bottom of the bottle. I don't know if you were supposed to stir it up or leave it settled on bottom.

 

In any case, it was excellent, like the proverbial liquid bread :)

Link to comment
I'm not much a beer fan, in fact, I rarely drink the stuff. I'm more of a martini guy. 2 martinis and you're set :sun:

 

However, I did have a beer once while in Freiburg, Germany that was delicious. I think it was Czech beer but I'm not sure. Anyways...it had some yeast in the bottom of the bottle. I don't know if you were supposed to stir it up or leave it settled on bottom.

 

In any case, it was excellent, like the proverbial liquid bread :)

92153[/snapback]

 

The best tasting beer has sediment floating around the bottle. When shopping for new imported brands in the store, I always hold the bottle up to the light to check for the sediment.

Link to comment

My kind of topic! :drink:

I love my beer! :bier:

 

The best beer I have ever tasted is made in Scotland by Innis & Gunn, it is aged in American white oak barrels. It is being imported into Canada and they can't keep it on the shelves in the liquor stores. It is $3.25 per 355 ml bottles, but it is worth every penny!

 

I have to stop telling everyone about this beer because it keeps getting sold out! :homer:

Link to comment
Now don't get me wrong.  I favor bocks, heavy lagers, ales and IPA's.  All imports, generally, except for micro-brewed US beers.  I have no real favorites, after all -- it's all just beer.

 

But one time I came across the following "thumbnail" review of CHEAP BEERS and bought a case just because the review was the best I'd read in a long time.  Miller's been my "stand-by" cheapo beer ever since.

 

CHEAP BEERS

 

Miller High Life

 

Advertised as the "champagne of beers", but that's much too frou-frou. I like "carbonated butter." Miller High Life is big slabs of deer meat on a toasted roll. It's dirty fingernails scooping out pumpkin pie. It makes even the most sterile suburbanite feel like a Teamster. It's outstanding.

 

Rating: Extremely outstanding.

 

__________

 

A few more CHEAP BEER reviews by the same reviewer:

__________

 

Czechvar

 

This is, apparently, a premium Czech lager. And that's probably a telling indicator of what life is like in the Czech Republic. It's watery, stale and tastes like the ass of a drunk sailor. Makes us wonder how long it takes to ship beer from over there.

 

Rating: Gross.

__________

 

St. Ides Malt Liquor

 

This beer gives me the willies. Other beers go down all fizzy, but this goes down in one big glob, like mother's milk. You can really hurt yourself with this crap. The bubbles make it fruity and at 99 cents for a 22-ounce bottle -- poverty makes it attractive.

 

Rating: Cheap.

__________

 

Country Club Malt Liquor

 

This is a Dear John letter from your brain to your liver. It's so smooth and creamy and refreshing I thought the can was made from magic. It packs a hell of a whallop and costs less than a buck a can. Seconds after finishing it, I quit my job and vowed to never wash again.

 

Rating: Niiice.

__________

 

Molson Canadian

 

I once knew this Canadian kid named Paul Gilbert. He had a strange hump on his back, was dumb as a tabletop and sported an enormous penis. This is that kind of beer. What else can you say? It's still cold. This is pretty good.

 

Rating: Pretty good.

__________

 

Hateuy

 

The primative liquids of this pungent beer lead to a nutty aftertaste that is quite unique. The 1950s, hand-brushed injun keeps staring at me, begging me to come to Cuba. Avenge me. There is more of this here for you. Oh, Mi Cooba! But no! Before I go, I feel like scalpin' a few Whiteys!

 

Rating: Inebriating.

__________

 

Steel Reserve 211

 

This was so wonderful, went down smooth as syrup and was really classy, baby. And then I remembered I'm not a Crack Whore! As long as there is any alcoholic alternative, including Prison Wine, this "Steel Reserve" will not pass my lips again.

 

Rating: Sucky.

__________

 

Budweiser Tall Boy

 

I am very drunk. This is the exact kind of thing I want. I just drank it while peeing, thinking to myself that the King of Beers was coming in and the Paupers of Beers were fleeing. That, of course, led to thoughts of why Communism has never taken a hold in the United States and I was just glad I was drinking American.

 

Rating: Freedom.

__________

 

Rolling Rock

 

After a hard day at work and mowing the lawn, I reach for a 16 oz. Rock. It's delicious and bubbly. It makes me want to boff redheads and short blondes. You can tell, from the hops and all that yeast and the amber flaxen how this beer could make you feel golden and moist inside.

 

Rating: Rockin'.

__________

 

Yuengling Traditional Lager

 

Although its brewed in a small Pennsylvania town, Yuengling tastes like it was brewed in a larger, more industrialized town. Perhaps Pittsburgh? Or maybe Allentown? After only two Yuenglings I feel I have the strength to take on a Puerto Rican gang, kill them, and steal *their* hubcaps.

 

Rating: Taut.

92142[/snapback]

I am Canadian and even I don't like Molson Canadian! You have to have your tastebuds tuned up! And Czechvar is a very good beer, it is the original Bubweiser ( before the stated stole the name) it is just as good as any German lager. You must have had a bad batch of this fine beer. I only drink lagers in the summertime, I'm more of an ale man myself. And nothing better than Guinness in the wintertime. :thumbsup:

Link to comment

"He is a wise man, who invented beer"-Mark Twain.

 

As you may know, I'm a serious hophead, brewing my beer the old fashioned way, according to the Bavarian purity law. I buy the grain and grind it, hops, and source only precultured live yeast. I brew everything here at home, not at a 'u-brew'. I have my own automatic keg system at home, so I'm quite comfortable talking about this.

Much like motorcycles, engine oil, and tires, beer styles and beer makes are going to be different to different people. There is no one best beer in the world. There is a most popular beer in the world however[Guinness Stout] .

My favourite style, as a hophead is of course India Pale Ale, IPA. There are great ones on tap, and cat piss on tap. There are great ones locally made in bottle, and cat piss made locally in the bottle. And there are great and not great ones internationally. No-one has the market cornered here, although small craft breweries in Oregon, Washington, and north California have a very strong argument saying they do. I've tasted many, from most everywhere in the world. I can tell you the worst so far I've tasted in Alexander Keith IPA, made somewhere in eastern Canada. Just terrible! The best locally made IPA in a bottle is from Phillips in Victoria, B.C., a one man show. His Amnesiac IPA is outstanding. Best locally brewed on tap is the IPA from Mission Springs Brewery in Mission, B.C.

The best I've ever tasted, clearly, is Continental King IPA from Wild Duck Brewery in Eugene, Oregon.

The best beer of any style I've tasted is the ESB [Extra Special Bitter] at the Theakson's Brewery in Masham, Yorkshire. Actually it was being served 20 ft across the street at the brewery owned hotel, I think it was The King's Hotel. Simply magnificent sampling.

Ciao, Steve G.

Link to comment
One of the most interesting things I have tried is Utopias by Samuel Adams.

Weird stuff, kind of like a sherry, or a prune juice, but with hints of brandy, and smokey flavor.

Anyone else try?

92166[/snapback]

at $100-150 a bottle for 2 pints worth of drinkin NO DL, I think it might just be you :huh2:

:bier:

Id like to try louis XIIV, I think thats how you do it, stupid roman numerals.

Link to comment
So, are you supposed to stir it up or leave it settled on bottom?

92159[/snapback]

 

Orson, in a commercial beer sediments typically show that the beer is bottle conditioned. In other words, a beer that was purposely bottled before it was fully fermented or was bottled along with additional fermentable ingredients and additional yeast. In general, what you are seeing is yeast. I suppose it is possible you might also find a rare example of a cask conditioned beer that had been bottled unfiltered and although no further fermentation takes place in the bottle, the spent yeast in suspension will settle out over time.

 

In the first two cases the yeast should be gently dispersed back into solution before pouring. (Many Belgium style beers are bottle conditioned and contain yeast sediments). In the third case, I'd pour the beer off leaving the yeast behind.

(You might find a thin layer of yeast in the bottom of a cask conditioned IPA that had been bottled).

 

Filtration is a big deal in the beer world and brewers go to great lengths to produce a crystal clear beer. The vast majority of beer drinkers worldwide have come to expect it. Even most small brewpubs where you might expect to find a true cask conditioned ale filter all their beers before serving. We would always set aside a small amount of cask conditioned beer for the few who knew and enjoyed it.

 

It really helps to know your styles when shopping for something new and different. Unless I know the the beer I am looking at has been bottle conditioned or it is called "cask conditioned" and there is stuff in the bottle, I'd leave it on the shelf.

 

Homebrewed beer will almost always have some yeast sediments in each bottle or the bottom of the keg. Thats because few have a means to filter their brews and then carbonate them by forcing co2 into solution. To carbonate a homebrewed beer you must either bottle the beer before it has finished fermenting (source of many exploding beer bottle stories) or add a small amount of "priming sugar" to each vessel when bottling the batch off. The priming sugar feeds the few remaining yeast cells in suspension which in turn create the co2 that give the beer its fizz. After dining on the sugar, the yeast drop to the bottom of the bottle. In this situation it would depend on the style of beer for me to decide whether I kick up the yeast or not. In either case, the yeast is full of good vitamins and trace elements. Some contend it lessens the symptoms of hangover.

 

Love that beer........... but be responsible!

Link to comment
One of the most interesting things I have tried is Utopias by Samuel Adams.

Weird stuff, kind of like a sherry, or a prune juice, but with hints of brandy, and smokey flavor.

Anyone else try?

92166[/snapback]

 

Yup. Good stuff for sure. Pete's Wicked Strawberry Ale's right up there as well. :bier:

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×
×
  • Create New...